shine your light into my life.

by Ashlynn
(Texas)

broken,hurt,lost and confused

these feelings have left me
bruised.
abbandoned,unloved,fat and ugly
tore me apart and left nothing
of me.
starving for perfection trying
to find hope.
always ending in the place I
fear the most.
i've been dealing with this
for so long maybe this is
the place I belong.
what scares me the most you
may ask?
The Truth.
i've spent soo much time
blinded by the lies that
when the truth shines light
I run and hide.
terrified of having hope,
what if I get hurt?
scared from all the times
i've been left in the dirt.
too scared to let others in
and my emotions out.
It makes me want to scream
and shout!
why do I do this to myself
maybe it would be diffrent
if accually let my emotions
out.
I run but I get nowhere.
I hide but without a doubt
ana (anorexia) finds me and kicks
me out.
leaving me with a knife to
dull away the pain.
my heart is shattered from
all of the strain.
I cannot take the teers no
longer.
i'm sick of all the pain.
Please Lord help me
i'm tired of all this pain.
let me sleep without a worry
in sight.
lead me and guide me into
your light.
I know it will be hard but
with your help I will soon get there.