Suicide Poetry

by Melisa Steele

"The Darkness"

A true story of pain and victory



The nights are so dark as Satan tries to claim my life,
Frightening screams echo forming a symbolic knife?..

Or is it real? I'm not sure, I can't tell?.
As I stand here against the very powers of hell.

Days consisting of such torture I want to die,
Nobody hears me down here & I don't know why

Are those echos of my own scream?
Confused "wandering" in circles it seems

Maybe I'm already dead, I really don?t know
Tired, I can't move, no, exhausted is my poor soul

Somebody save me before it's too late,
The battles are hard, this can't be my fate

How did I even get in here? More importantly How do I get out?
Lord, where are you? Do you not rescue me because my heart is in doubt?

Are you there & I just can't see you? Christ, please don't leave...
I need You, this weight is so heavy I can barely even breathe

The loneliness is so intense & I can't silence the past
The pain is rising up in me, I better thing fast

Anguish, soon this will turn into rage
Trapped in my own prison, locked in this cage

HaHaHa, oh what a joke, nobody has a clue to what I hide,
They think I'm ok but what a mess on the inside

I have had enough, I'm walking on the edge,
Not too much longer before I fall off the ledge

Time is ticking, the sands of the hour glass disappearing,
I need to talk God into reappearing

"God, I want to live!", I said, "Show me the way to go."
"Hold fast to the hope", He said, "and for now bow down low?

The war will be fought and won by Jesus Christ the saving One
Let the Devil and his darkness see who he's really up against?

The Son has died to defeat the death for all the world to see,
Dear child you are not alone when you invest you life in Me!

And so here I am, by the grace of God I am victorious,
I live another day & the punishment of the enemy will be just

I will stand up & praise Him while all the others laugh,
But it's only because they haven't been on that journey to hell & back?

After writing this my Bible fell open to this passage:

2 Samuel 22

David's Song of Praise

1 David sang to the LORD the words of this song when the LORD delivered him from the hand of all his enemies and from the hand of Saul.

2 He said: "The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer;

3 my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge,
my shield and the horn of my salvation.
He is my stronghold, my refuge and my savior,
from violent men you save me.

4 I call to the LORD, who is worthy of praise,
and I am saved from my enemies.

5 "The waves of death swirled about me;
the torrents of destruction overwhelmed me.

6 The cords of the grave coiled around me;
the snares of death confronted me.

7 In my distress I called to the LORD;
I called out to my God.
From his temple he heard my voice;
my cry came to his ears.

8 "The earth trembled and quaked,
the foundations of the heavens shook;
they trembled because he was angry.

9 Smoke rose from his nostrils;
consuming fire came from his mouth,
burning coals blazed out of it.

10 He parted the heavens and came down;
dark clouds were under his feet.

11 He mounted the cherubim and flew;
he soared on the wings of the wind.

12 He made darkness his canopy around him?
the dark rain clouds of the sky.

13 Out of the brightness of his presence
bolts of lightning blazed forth.

14 The LORD thundered from heaven;
the voice of the Most High resounded.

15 He shot arrows and scattered the enemies ,
bolts of lightning and routed them.

16 The valleys of the sea were exposed
and the foundations of the earth laid bare
at the rebuke of the LORD,
at the blast of breath from his nostrils.

17 "He reached down from on high and took hold of me;
he drew me out of deep waters.

18 He rescued me from my powerful enemy,
from my foes, who were too strong for me.

19 They confronted me in the day of my disaster,
but the LORD was my support.

20 He brought me out into a spacious place;
he rescued me because he delighted in me.

21 "The LORD has dealt with me according to my righteousness; according to the cleanness of my hands he has rewarded me.

22 For I have kept the ways of the LORD;
I have not done evil by turning from my God.

23 All his laws are before me;
I have not turned away from his decrees.

24 I have been blameless before him
and have kept myself from sin.

25 The LORD has rewarded me according to my righteousness, according to my cleanness in his sight.

26 "To the faithful you show yourself faithful,
to the blameless you show yourself blameless,

27 to the pure you show yourself pure,
but to the crooked you show yourself shrewd.

28 You save the humble,
but your eyes are on the haughty to bring them low.

29 You are my lamp, O LORD;
the LORD turns my darkness into light.

30 With your help I can advance against a troop;
with my God I can scale a wall.

31 "As for God, his way is perfect;
the word of the LORD is flawless.
He is a shield
for all who take refuge in him.

32 For who is God besides the LORD -
And who is the Rock except our God?

33 It is God who arms me with strength
and makes my way perfect.

34 He makes my feet like the feet of a deer;
he enables me to stand on the heights.

35 He trains my hands for battle;
my arms can bend a bow of bronze.

36 You give me your shield of victory;
you stoop down to make me great.

37 You broaden the path beneath me,
so that my ankles do not turn.

38 "I pursued my enemies and crushed them;
I did not turn back till they were destroyed.

39 I crushed them completely, and they could not rise; they fell beneath my feet.

40 You armed me with strength for battle;
you made my adversaries bow at my feet.

41 You made my enemies turn their backs in flight, and I destroyed my foes.

42 They cried for help, but there was no one to save them- to the LORD, but he did not answer.

43 I beat them as fine as the dust of the earth;
I pounded and trampled them like mud in the streets.

44 "You have delivered me from the attacks of my people;
you have preserved me as the head of nations. People I did not know are subject to me,

45 and foreigners come cringing to me;
as soon as they hear me, they obey me.

46 They all lose heart; they come trembling from their strongholds.

47 "The LORD lives! Praise be to my Rock!
Exalted be God, the Rock, my Savior!

48 He is the God who avenges me,
who puts the nations under me,

49 who sets me free from my enemies.
You exalted me above my foes;
from violent men you rescued me.

50 Therefore I will praise you, O LORD, among the nations; I will sing praises to your name.

51 He gives his king great victories;
he shows unfailing kindness to his anointed, to David and his descendants forever."

You are not alone

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