The Prodigal's Brother
Most Children who have grown up in the church have heard of the story the Prodigal Son. When the Prodigal son asks his father for his inheritance, and then he blows all of it and winds up alone. When he goes back to his father, his father welcomes him back with open arms! The Prodigal brother on the other hand, wasn't too happy about letting his screwup brother back in. So while his whole family rejoiced; he sulked in the background.
Now, you may be asking yourself, "Why is she bringing this up? Is she the Prodigal Son?". As a matter of fact, no. I am the Prodigal's Brother. Let me explain:
I was born into a wonderful Christian family. I was a shy kid, with two older sisters as my best friends. Marie-my oldest sister- was adopted by my parents at the age of three. She had alchohol poisoning while her mother was pregnant, and as a result; she had ALOT of problems. She was bipolar, ADHD, and many other things. She was always a difficult child, with violent tendencies and major temper tantrums. Definitely not your average daughter. She was obnoxious and unhygenic and physically abuse. Nichole-my other sister-protected me from most of the things Marie did; but I have mentally blocked out the rest. My parents were the best parents we could have had. They are trusting, loving, God-fearing people who are (to this day) my role models. I would not be the same without them.
When Marie hit her teenage years, everything went downhill. She lit things in our house on fire, she was angrier, and she hated her medication. When she finally blew up and pushed my mom into a wall, my parents sent her to a program to protect us. She was only 16. She bounced from program to program. Then when she ran out of programs, she bounced from family member to family member.
Fast forwarding to 3 years ago: Marie called us on our house phone, "I'm pregnant." She told us. "I want to keep the baby."
We were in shock. Marie did not have the mental capacity to handle a baby. We all knew it. In the first month of her pregnancy, she took crack and many other drugs. As if the baby needed any more brain damage, Marie already messed up enough. She took no prenatal vitamins and got in fights with other girls while she was pregnant. And on September 11th, 2007 Jim was born.
It only took Marie five days to be tired of him. I am just grateful to God that she called us instead of hurting him or herself. Because of the drugs in the first month, Jim was a very finicky baby, sensitive to EVERYTHING. I was only 13 when we took him in.
At about a year into taking Jim, my sister Nichole started acting different. She was bossy and just all-in-all ignorant of everything going on. My cousin needed a place to stay so we let her come stay at our house (We have housed almost everyone of my cousins at one time or another. My mom has always had an open door policy) The influence of my cousin didn't help the situation. Nichole was sneaking out to go makeout with guys she barely knew. She lost her virginity by the age of 16. She was searching for a soulmate. She longed for a connection and someone to love. She forced me into keeping her secrets from my parents. At 17, she moved out into a cousins apartment a few hours away. All she wanted was freedom from what she thought was our "judgment", we were just worried about her. She found a new boyfriend, and they moved in together. She denies that they slept with each other, but I dont know what to believe anymore. Even though I saw the pain that Marie brought my parents, I didn't understand it until Nichole did it to me.
I am now 16. My parents have had Jim all of his life, he will be 3 in September. Marie has informed us that she is pregnant again. My parents cannot take another baby. Jim is bipolar with all of the same problems Marie had. Nichole has moved back into our house.
I have seen the pain my sisters have put my parents through. My parents expect me to hurt them like my sisters hurt them. My sister is moving back in.
Now I find myself with a Prodigal's Brother mentality. I don't want to welcome her back. She has broken all of her promises to me and my parents. She ruined my parents trust.
I pray to God everyday for all that he has given me. A house, parents that adore me, and a passion for missions. I forgive Nichole a little bit everyday and God is beginning to fill the hole she left in my heart. And as I see her every morning, only God's word can give me comfort.
Psalms 62:1-2
1 My soul finds rest in God alone;
my salvation comes from him.
2 He alone is my rock and my salvation;
he is my fortress, I will never be shaken.
One day I might wake up and find that I have no more bitterness in my heart. Until then, I trust in God alone. He is the only comfort I have.