wow these people dont really know me

by sha boogie
(new york )

kneeling on the side of my bed,body filled with pain,heart clenched in pain, soul ringing on fire. letting my mind wonder as i come accross some things. people dont seem to really know the real me. they claim they know me but they really dont. they dont know that the real me wakes up to a messed up home. and lays down with a dream to never wake up again. they dont know that eveytime i lay my head down on that pillow,im shortly dying. im dying from having to live in a place of low-self esteem,no confidence. living in a house where i feel like a motherless child.

they dont know that my soul crys oput for for help everyday and night. they dont know these things. my eyes are running over. my throat is filled with a lump. my soul is telling me that it's done.

i dont know who i am . i dont even know why i am here.where is my real family. i dont belong here.the mother i have makes me feel like an abandon baby lost at sea drowning in it's own tears. i dont even call this man a father, he's known to me as "him". yo he made me like this. told me he was gonna call me and never did. claims that he trys to see me but never has. because of him i allowed myself to get raped. because of him i dont know how to trust people. yo i hate everything .

i throw myself around to dudes whom i think would love and treat me right. i lost my virginity thinking i was gonna find love. but i never did. i get drunk and high to release stress but it does nothing to me. i fight to let others know how i feel but they dont get it. yo i'm not even gonna voice myself nor speak. im just gonna keep quiet and let my life do what it wants to do. but there is one thing that i do want and that's to actually not care about anything.

Comments for wow these people dont really know me

Click here to add your own comments

There is a way out
by: Sarah

Dear Sha Boogie,

I read your message posting and felt my heart sinking. I just wanted to let you know that people do care about you, perhaps you haven't met any that have, but there are people who care and who will care for you. I care. Even though I'm halfway across the world and I don't even know you and you don't even know me.

But I care, because my Heavenly Father cares for me and loves me as His child. It doesn't matter if we do not have good parents on earth, because we have a Heavenly Father, and He provides abundant and never-ending and unconditional love towards you and me. He loves with a love we can't even begin to understand. He created us from the beginning of time. He knows your name and He knows your struggles. He knows what you are going through and He wants to help you.

You can have a Heavenly Father too. He is not far away. If you seek Him, you will find Him. He will make Himself known to you and you will feel near to Him. You can have brothers and sisters too, all believers in Christ are brothers and sisters and love each other and respect each other because He first loved us.

He loved us so much He gave His only Son to die on the cross for us, some 2000 years ago. That is recorded in history. Yet because He is God, He is still here today, He is everywhere, and He can be in your heart and Your life, if you let Him.

Speak with the Father today, tell Him what you are going through, cry out to Him for help, ask Him to guide you and provide you with friends and family, ask Him to shower His love on you. He will make Himself known to you, just like He made Himself known to me.

The important thing is, stop hating your life. Your life has a purpose, He created you for a purpose, and you are going to live it. Don't give up your life because it can only get better from here. You need a Saviour, because only He can fill your heart and your life of that emptiness that you are feeling. Nobody else can take His place. Seek Him everyday.

He can really change your life and I want you to know that you are loved and you are precious in His sight.

You may say you don't want to care or do anything, but I know how you feel, because we all want to be loved and to be cared for. Man will always fail, because we are sinful by nature. But God will not fail. If you trust in Him, He will make your paths straight and turn your life around.

Would you like to invite Him into your life today?

In Christ, and praying for you,

Sarah

God Bless
by: Amanda

I'm not going to pretend like I've been there, that I know what you're going through, because to be perfectly honest, I don't. But I would recommend reading the book of Job. I don't know if you know the story, but I'll summarize it here. God had blessed Job, and Job praised God with all his heart. When Satan saw this, he told God,"Job is only praising you because you have blessed him." God gave Satan permission to take everything Job had, but not to lay a finger on the man himself. When Job lost all of his servants, his children, his livestock, Satan expected him to cry out against God. Instead, he fell to his knees and worshipped. God allowed Satan to perform another test, this time attacking Job's body, but not enough to kill him, just enough to make him hate God in his heart. Job thought God was being unfair to him; didn't Job obey God? Job's friends proceeded to give him advice, but none of it was true, and Job was angry. Finally, in the end, God explained to them that just because Job was experiencing trials didn't mean he was an unrighteous man; there were other reasons for trials in this life than punishment.

Some people say that God won't give us more than we can handle; I think that's one of the biggest lies among Christians today. God's promise is not that He won't give us more than we can handle, but that we'll never have to handle it alone.God is right there with you, and he grieves when you are in pain as much as you do.

There are two records of Jesus crying in his life; one is the death of John the Baptist, and the other is for Lazarus. In the latter incident, Jesus knew that Lazarus would be raised from the dead, yet he grieved for the people who didn't know that, because our God is a God of compassion. Remember that compassion when times are rough, and you will have God's peace.

Click here to add your own comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Power of Your Testimony.

FREE Book and Bible Study for Teen Girls

Sign Up Below & Get This eBook FREE

Thank you for subscribing!


Get More Information



Let's Connect Online



Free Daily Devos
for Teen Girls

Sign up below to have these devos sent to your email daily.

Thank you for subscribing!

Click here for weekly devos or to find out more!

Get the Books!

21 Devos 
Only $0.99

Volume 1

Volume 2 



Books for All Ages


Candid Conversations -
Read real life stories from real Christian women, and discover how God has used their struggles to either refine their faith or used their faith to help them weather the storm. 

Get your copy here


Body Image Lies Women Believe - Read 26 different stories from 26 women and learn how to overcome body image lies with God's truth.

Get your copy here

Broken Crayons Still Color - Shelley Hitz shares how our biggest regrets, failures and mistakes become what God uses the most in our lives. 

Get your copy here

Worthy To Be Loved - We're told that purity is precious; that our virginity is a gift. So what happens once that "gift" has been opened? Join Jessica in this book to find out.

Get your copy here

Please note that we are a member of the Amazon affiliate program which is designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com.


Get True Beauty Stuff!